My New Years Resolution

This year my new years resolution is simple - fight resistance each and everyday with every ounce of my being and just do my work!

I've thought a lot about just exactly what my work is or should be in 2013. The answers I've come up have honestly suprised me. Perhaps the reason for this has been a far greater recourse to nature in order to explore the depths of my being and my relationship with the world, or perhaps its just the looming milestone of turning 40 and the inevitable mid-life crisis that that entails. Either way I've found the answers to be both enlightening and empowering. In fact, I'm actually quite excited about what life in 2014 has in store.

2013 was a year in which I came face to face with my inner demon, and fell in love with it. That is not to say that I have decided to commit to its will or worship it. Far from it. What I have learned is that I have an ability to fight it as an equal. When the fight is honest, true and aggressive. When I win and my demon submits. At that moment it reveals deep insights about life, my character and the universe. It becomes my teacher. I have fallen in love with its ability to teach and I have fallen in love with the fight, because without the fight there is no life. With a good fight, a fully engaged fight - there is true passion!

Die each day, be born again each morning - the struggle with the demon is relentless. I have felt its lust for me and perhaps even its love. Certainly this demon is one horny mother fucker! Its at the one time hughely generous with its praise, while also being vicious and demeaning in the extreme with its criticism. It has shown me the extent of my glory and the sheer insignificance of my being in a single moment as it both tempts my ego and mocks my humanity. It won't show its face or reveal its true intentions, but, has access to parts of my mind that I have long forgotten about or have yet to encounter.

But, I am not frightened by this creature. In fact, quite the opposite. I am comforted by its presence and have enjoyed the battle of wills that it challenges me to on an hourly basis.

I am convinced that my successful battle with this demon will be what defines 2014 for me. My daily struggle to overcome resistance and achieve my true potential. This is the path that will lead me to create and to love. To be in each moment what I was born to be. Free and fully alive!

This battle requires discipline, sound routine and extreme will power. It requires me not to be distracted. To stay focused. To sit down each day and do my work! This is my commitment to myself in 2014. This is my new years resolution.

Bring on the fight you horny mother fucker!